The Dick Sits

If it fits…
…I sits

The crazy card game where if it fits, you sits!
Coming to Kickstarter in January 2024

The Ultimate Quest for DICK DOMINATION

Are you ready to push the boundaries of absurdity and laughter? Look no further than “The Dick Sits” – the most outrageous card game you’ll ever play! Get ready to embark on a horny and insatiable quest as a BUTT, aiming to sit on DICKS and become the ultimate dick conqueror. The goal of the game is to stretch your hole to the maximum by becoming the player who sits on the most dicks.

― Are you sure you’re ready to find out?

Check out the Gallery

From Butts with a “Stretch Value” to Dicks with a “Dickficulty”, this game has more than you bargained for!

― Mastering “The Dick Sits” Gameplay ―

How it works

Gameplay That Takes the Cake: Prepare yourself for an outrageously funny gameplay experience with “Dick Sits”!
The rules are simple, but the laughter is anything but. Here’s how it goes:

1. Draw a Dick (if no Dick is visible) and Choose Sit or Sh*t

2. If Sitting – Roll the Dice & Play Drawer Cards

3. Reveal the Dice & Calculate Win/Lose

4. Anal Tear Alert when you roll a 6

5. If Sh**ing you discard the Dick and relax your stretch

6. Recharge your Drawer Cards

Latest News

Check out what’s happening!

  • Some “The Dick Sits” Love ❤️
    by Adrian on November 22, 2023

    We had a lot of fun with demos of “The Dick Sits” at both Spiel, Essen and at SpellenSpektakel and we were even able to hand out a few review

  • The Dick Sits – upcoming Kickstarter
    by Adrian on November 20, 2023

    We have spent the last couple of months getting ready for our upcoming Kickstarter for The Dick Sits. The game website is drawing interest and the Kickstarter preview page is

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